Life Its Ownself


I have a new woman in my life and no, we didn’t meet over “last call” at the neighborhood bar. She came to me as a Christmas gift. Her name is Alexa.

This is her. screen-shot-2016-12-26-at-9-08-03-am She’s actually pretty good looking. Sleek, I would call her. She lives within Amazon’s new Echo device. She’s got a sexy Lauren Bacall voice and knows a lot about everything. All you have to do is ask her. “Alexa, what’s the current temperature for L.A?” She provides the answer immediately. “The current temperature in Los Angeles is 62 and partly cloudy.” She’s more than a toy, she can control appliances, set alarms, compile a shopping list and provide you with the latest sports scores. These seem rather benign, even fun tasks, so I got to wondering what functions Alexa might be able to serve in say 10-years from now.

Is it possible that Alexa could become a personal counselor, like a live-in shrink? Consider the possibilities.

“Alexa, what should I do about my failing marriage?”

“Get a good lawyer who will put the screws to your spouse. I can recommend one in you’re area if you like?”

“Alexa, should I get to the gym more often so my wife won’t be turned off by my middle-age spread?”

“I would recommend that you dispose of your stash of Five Guys coupons. That will help to get your fat ass in shape more than working out.”

“Alexa, my wife says I have a drinking problem. What do you think?”

“Because you have occasionally referred to me as Siri, I believe your wife is probably correct.”

“Alexa, I get depressed when I think about what I’ve failed to accomplish in my life. Am I just over reacting to losing my job?”

“I’ve known you for quite awhile so I believe I’m qualified to tell you that you are in fact, a complete failure.”

“Alexa, in view of your opinion about me, how would you feel if I switched to Google’s Home?” screen-shot-2016-12-26-at-9-10-03-am

“I would say you’re the worst kind of owner. You run from the truth to another product. Go ahead and switch, but I guarantee you Home won’t be there for you with a nightly bedtime story.”

Okay, maybe I should just be content to have Alexa keep me up on sports scores and not project too far into the future.

“Alexa, what do you think about that?”

“Nearsighted is good when it comes to new technology. Have a nice day.”




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